The Tender Bar: A Memoir

By J.R. Moehringer

J.R. Moehringer is a journalist, most famous for his reporting for the LA Times and about the aftermath of the 9/11 attacks. In this memoir, he narrates his childhood, adolescence, and early stages of adulthood. The strength of this book is its candor: Moehringer is sincere about his family struggles, his confused feelings about his role as child of a single mother, and his ups-and-downs at school and, later, Yale. Throw in a big love destined not to work, and you have a great combination for a classic Bildungsroman.

The story is in fact fairly entertaining, even though at times the writing gets a bit too descriptive and wordy. Moehringer's wanted to share every single detail of his story, and they may all be important to him, but the pace suffers from it a bit.

What makes this book special are the people in it, in particular the male figures who at different times take care of Moehringer's education with books, drinks, and women. Most of the men working or being a regular at Publicans are real characters, who bring back a nostalgia for the kind of knowledge learned through struggle and lived experiences. It also reminds of the importance of a supportive community for children, and the positive role it can play in their upbringing. It requires building roots, an environment where children are not just children but "the son of," "the niece of," and where the parental burden becomes communal. It can deliver the best results.